Part time job

Its been 3 months and 11 days since I came to Brighton, England... Since the day I got here, I have been obsessing about getting a part time job, because that's the only way I can make my ends meet without bugging my beloved father anymore... I was trying everything and everywhere.. or so I thought...

Because of the job hunt.. I was not being able to concentrate on my studies as I was supposed to... I was surrounded with people who thought having a part time job is an unnecessary and unappealing strata to their student life...

I always thought it must be a piece of cake for someone like me... who believes that I can do any kind of job... this is the only area where my inferiority complex does not bug me...but I was not successful...

When I started seeing people getting a job, having money with them and live an active life, I became jealous and confronted myself with my over running complexes... but I didn't get an answer...

I was even forgetting the fact that, I am in my dream land and I should go out, make friends and enjoy life like I always wanted to.. but I didn't ... I was sitting at my room, not talking to anybody..finding excuses for staying in and telling it to myself, as I didn't have anyone to talk to...

You must be thinking why such a simple matter should become such a big problem... See... thats where you are wrong... it wasn't a simple matter for me...!!! for me..having a part time meant alot... as it would get me some money of my own..which I could use for so many things..such as shopping, hanging out at the city's cool places, sight seeing, taking part in some of the sporting events and so on....

Even though, one of my flatmate did ask me to accompany her with her friends to a gorgeous thing happening at a place called Eastbourne.. I couldn't go because.. I didnt wanted to spend the money I had with me.... I couldn't enjoy any of the city's cool things because of that...

I couldn't go out of town on my holidays... I was holding back myself and staying in my room, thinking.. the less I went out ..the less money I will be spending...

When I see my classmates go on tours and shopping fiestas and have this "talk" on the cool things they did and the parties they attend everyday.. I sit there, thinking about some excuses to come up with, for not knowing the cool places they were talking about...

Now, by God's grace, I got a job... I just joined today... I dont know whether I will like it, or they will like me... how long will I last.. but one thing is for sure... I will definitely make an effort to change the things they were...and try to live an active and fulfilling life..as I am aware that I am never going to get back these 3 months and 11 days...but I surely dont want to miss the rest of the 9 months that I am gonna be here ....